Prof. Carlin Now Will Continue the Lesson

By popular demand — which means I unilaterally decided to do this — here are more English corrections with Professor George Carlin. Taken from an audio book.

cop out — It means an admission of guilt (to cop a plea). It is not an excuse.

getting the monkey off one’s back — It refers to ending a dependency, not breaking a losing streak.

an eye for an eye — It’s a call for fairness, not revenge. As a referee, I hear something similar all the time: “Call it both ways!”

kudos — It’s pronounced “CUE-doze” and is a singular noun meaning “praise.” Its plural form is spelled and pronounced the same.

race, color and creed — In this usage, race and color describe the same property. Creed means “religion,” not Rocky Balboa’s boxing opponent.

everything comes in threes — Actually, everything comes in ones. When three ones come together, it seems like threes.

you can’t take it with you when you die — Actually, you can take a dark blue suit with you, and you probably can put some stuff in the pockets.

you learn something new every day — You actually learn something old every day. It’s just new to you.

it takes two to tango — Actually, it takes one, but it takes two to tango together.

meteoric rise — Meteors fall, not rise.

talk until you’re blue in the face — Impossible. If you talk, you’ve got the oxygen you need. If you’re blue in the face, you’re not talking because you don’t have the oxygen.

Until next time! Use the right words!

It’s here! My début book, “If You Experience Death, Please Call: And Other Fatal Mistakes We Make With Language” is available on Amazon for only $14.95.  Order here.

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